Aaron

[mooningremus]

Remus ate three sausages for breakfast. He was flushed; he tended to get a bit feverish before the full moon. And he managed to get through a morning class without saying a word to anyone, for fear of losing his temper over the smallest thing.

He was also avoiding Aaron as best he could, but when he went back to the room after class, when he thought Aaron would be out, he discovered he was wrong.

"I thought you'd be at practice," he blurted.

Comments

[quitollis]

"Yes," Aaron said. He wouldn't lie about that. "I can't imagine going through that every month. I'm amazed you're even standing right now."

[mooningremus]

"I uh, I don't really remember anything," Remus said. "After right after it starts." He wanted Aaron to tell him. But maybe not until he was lying down.

[quitollis]

"You don't know?" Aaron asked, surprised. "I guess that's good. I'll tell you, if you like, but let's get inside first."

[mooningremus]

"I mean I remember... the beginning," Remus said. The pain, that was. Though he didn't know if it got worse.

[quitollis]

They got to their room first, and Aaron waited for Remus to sit before he explained. "Every bone in your body breaks and shifts to their new position. Muscles transform and you... I know it hurts because you scream throughout. Until the wolf takes over and he howls in pain as well."

[mooningremus]

Remus looked down at his hands. "That sounds about right," he said quietly. "It's all I remember, the pain, but at least I black out pretty quickly."

[quitollis]

Aaron put a hand on Remus' leg, hoping to provide some comfort. "It threw itself against the window a few times, but... it gave up at some point," Aaron continued. "I talked to it. I know that's silly, but I didn't know what to do so I just told it stories."

[mooningremus]

Remus' expression softened into a smile. "You're wonderful," he said softly.

[quitollis]

"It seemed content enough to listen. Or it was just tired. It might have been. After our er...what we did," Aaron said. He never was one to take compliments very well.

[mooningremus]

"You know, I actually feel... better, than I usually do," Remus admitted. "I'm still tired and sore, but... usually it's worse."

[quitollis]

"That's good," Aaron said, very glad to hear that.

He didn't know if this would be putting his foot in, but... "I don't know if you want to hear this, but... it's a beautiful wolf. I know you're saying you don't remember anything, but... it has your eyes, or at least... eyes like yours."

[mooningremus]

"I - " Remus felt such a barrage of emotions at that. And he just didn't know what to say to that.

Finally he settled on, "Thank you for being there for me, Aaron."

[quitollis]

Aaron pulled him in for a hug. He didn't know what to say to that either.

"Want to shower? Or sleep? "

[mooningremus]

Remus brushed his lips to Aaron's arm. "You stayed awake all night too, didn't you? Why don't we take a nap together."

[quitollis]

"I think I fell asleep, but yes, I could do with a nap," he said. He pulled off his shirt and lay down on the bed, inviting Remus to come lie with him.

[mooningremus]

Remus did the same, and settled down in Aaron's arms, curling against him. "I don't know if I can express what a difference this makes," he said softly. "Usually this is all just... just despair."

[quitollis]

"That sounds good," Aaron said, feeling very glad about that. "You look better than last time. No doctor's needed, at least."

[mooningremus]

"It's also that I don't feel so alone," Remus said quietly.

[quitollis]

Aaron kissed the top of his head. "Yeah... same goes for me, actually."

[mooningremus]

I love you, thought Remus.

But didn't say it. That was way too scary.

"Mmmm let's nap," he said instead, and closed his eyes, snuggling against him.

[quitollis]

Those same words crossed Aaron's mind. But he didn't know if he dared say them. Instead, he held Remus closed and smiled as he fell asleep.