mooningremus

Aaron

Remus' good spirits had come to a grinding halt after his encounter with Willy. It was the indifference that was the worst part of it. It wasn't just that Willy hadn't loved him. It seemed he thought nothing of him at all. Even if he'd cared about him as a friend, he wouldn't have let him think this whole time that he'd d been the one to ruin it...

His finger felt naked without the ring. And he couldn't face going back to the flat. Not tonight. He almost went to a hostel. But there was one person he could call.

Or rather, he texted: Is there any way I might stay with you tonight?

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"You deserve someone who's there for you," Aaron said.

That gave Remus pause. He lowered his teacup back to the table and carefully went back over Aaron's words.

"You mean, as a business partner, or a friend or...?" His voice trailed off, with the question mark obvious at the end.

He said too much. "Yes," he said weakly. "I'm sorry. That probably happened in my mind only." Of course Remus didn't feel the same.

"What? No, I..." Remus' cheeks went slightly pink. "I mean, I um. I like you."

"You just came out of a bad relationship..." Aaron said, not judgemental, but a carefully stated truth.

"I believe we established early on that you and I are both getting over relationships," Remus said, then added, "I confess, I'm not sure precisely what you're objecting to."

"I just don't want to turn this into more than it could realistically become," Aaron said. "You deserve better than that."

Remus very nearly just said - so noted, you've warned me. But then, that was terribly familiar, wasn't it? Willy had warned him, too. Why would you be so stupid as to fall in love with me, my little mouse, Willy had said.

So, okay. He wouldn't be stupid this time. No falling in love with Aaron.

So instead he said, "I just tossed away a ring, I've no desire to pick up another."

It was stupid to feel hurt over a sentiment he'd encouraged, but Aaron still felt a little hurt. But it was clear Remus didn't think of him as anything beyond a friend. Good.

Right?

"Good," he said. It was for the best.

Honestly, Remus felt slightly hurt, too. But he should listen this time, right?

Still, he looked away for a moment, awkward. After all, he's the one who'd said it: I like you.

He took a sip of his tea.

Aaron liked him too. Too much, that was the problem. This was for the best. Expectation management. Surely.

"I just thought it would be better to clear things."

"Yeah, yeah of course," Remus said, nodding. "I mean, look what a mess I'm coming out of. This is good. And I mean, to be clear, I'm really enjoying... what we've been doing, but if you ever, you know, don't want to, it's totally fine. I just don't want to jeopardize a friendship."

"Yes, exactly," Aaron agreed. "It's the same for me." He was really just telling himself that here, in the hopes to make it real. He had no idea how to talk about relationships, not his own in any case. The only ones he had for reference were his wife (they never talked and Aaron just sort of left) and Alain (they did talk, a little, but then Aaron killed a man and ran away).

Well, Aaron had said it. Friends with benefits. He really couldn't be more clear. And see, this was clear from the start. Much better than with Willy, who confused him right out of the gate with that "I'll love you for a week" nonsense.

"All right then, good, we're sorted," said Remus, and nodded.

Aaron smiled. This was better. It wouldn't lead to disappointment, and it might save his friendship with Remus, which was starting to mean a lot to him.

"I've got a bit of a night off, tonight," Aaron said, changing the subject. "If you like, we could watch a movie. There's a television."

"That would be lovely," said Remus, thinking how awfully normal. That made him smile. "Thanks again for letting me come over, I just didn't want to be alone."

"Always," Aaron assured him with a smile. "I should probably buy something for dinner and snacks for the film. And drinks - there's nothing here beyond tea and water."

Remus considered this for a moment and then said, "If you're going to go to the store anyway, I could cook, though..." He sighed and set down the teacup. "Why don't we just go to my flat. You're right, I should leave, but I can't right away, and there's no good reason not to use it. And I don't mind being there tonight, as long as I'm not... you know. Alone."

"Oh, sure," Aaron agreed. "A home-cooked meal; that's been a while," he laughed.

Remus beamed. "Oh good! I love cooking." And Aaron wasn't a vegetarian, he had that on Willy. "Let's do that, then. Might as well make use of the place while I have it, hmm?"

Aaron smiled, liking the enthusiasm he'd caused. It was nice seeing Willy smile.

They left then, to Willy's apartment and arrived there a few tube stations later. It was very different from the priest's flat. Very bohemian. Clean, but clearly suited for a more vagrant and free life-style.

"This is nice," Aaron said, politely.

"Certainly nice than other places I've lived," Remus said. "Though I didn't really... redecorate or anything. Since it didn't feel like mine. Wine?" He bent over the fridge. "And I have... hmm, pork chops, and let's see, enough root vegetables to roast."

"Sounds delicious already," Aaron said and walked to the fridge. "Let me get the wine, at least. I hate feeling useless."

Remus handed him the bottle; it was a cheap white. "Corkscrew is in the drawer to the left of the sink," he said.

Then as he pulled out a few more things. "Also there's a loaf of fresh bread just there - why don't you cut some slices to snack on while I cook? And..." He pulled out a small container. "Honey butter." He'd gotten into the habit of keeping that around because of Willy but he'd gotten accustomed to it.

"Yes, of course," Aaron said, happy to help. He poured wine in two glasses first and set one on the counter next to Remus. "There you are."

He took a drink first and then sought out the bread and butter. "You enjoy cooking?" he asked, pleasantly.

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